On Self-Care

What is something kind you are going to do for yourself?

This is a question I ask the clients I work with on a weekly basis. For most of us, we were not taught to nurture or be kind to ourselves. 

My encouragement to you is to think about how you can be kind and gentle with yourself, whether it’s taking an extra long shower, enjoying your favorite cup of coffee in the morning (something I love), listening to your favorite song, engaging in a hobby or creating space for yourself to just be - whatever self-care looks like for you. 

Often times our self-doubt and our belief of not being enough stems from the way we were nurtured or not nurtured as children. 

Briefly stated, we were not taught to truly love ourselves for all that we are. Instead, some of us were taught “conditional love.” Real talk, you absolutely do not have to tire yourself out, checking off all the boxes on a list to be kind to yourself or be loved the way that you need.

I encourage you to be aware of the voice you are listening to. Is it yours or what you were told?

Sometimes we get stuck in our past and our pain, making us feel undeserving of self-compassion. I’m here to remind you not to lose yourself in the pain that weighs you down. Yes, it’s heavy, yet you have the innate capacity to overcome anything. It is when you acknowledge that the weight of your past is no longer serving that you can let go of survival mode. Know that You are not your trauma experience. You are not a diagnosis. You are not your parents. You are not the negative thoughts that trick you. You have the capacity to break the transgenerational cycle (you don’t have to be like them or continue the family cycle). You are not your past. 

You are here now. Be kind to your heart. This is how you allow yourself to heal.  

I hope this year you become deeply fluent in self-love and that your self-confidence and self-worth become second nature to you. I hope you grow kind self-thoughts filled with self-compassion and that you honor and nurture your heart. I hope you realize you are deserving of everything. 

Know that self-love is a process. Growth will come in your own way,  so be patient with yourself. Know that you deserve to love yourself fully and be loved in the way that you need without conditions.

I encourage you to ask yourself and your loved ones this question “What is something kind you are going to do for yourself? ” and actively care for yourself. 

Remember you are much more than you think you are. The light within you will heal you. 

Love & Light,

Mary

Photo Credit: maxine_machine