LOVE > Hate
“I wrote this personal piece as a way to process my outrage and, ultimately, help myself stay grounded in love and solidarity with my community. I hope reading it can be as therapeutic as it was to write.””
"Love>Hate"
I refuse to let this heartache harden my bleeding heart.
I refuse to wear hatred like an armor.
Just to try and protect myself from what it feels like to witness the painful consequences of ignorant actions.
Instead, I will let this heartache crack my heart open.
I will let this heartache seep in through the wide-open seams and let love persist.
Ignorance will not quiet my voice.
Hate will not harden me.
Abuse will not steal my spirit.
Manipulation will not dissolve my integrity.
Control will not rob me of the freedom inside my expansive heart.
I do this for the children who are separated from their honorable hard-working immigrant parents.
I do this for the trans teen who just wants to feel comfortable in their own skin.
I do this for those who want a choice in how a pregnancy can affect their bodies, health, & futures.
I do this for the parents who want to send their children to school without fear that their lives will be lost to gun violence.
I do this for the BIPOC communities who have been surviving cycles of trauma, substance abuse, incarceration, and poverty due to sustaining oppressive systems.
All of which could be solved if the power-holding billionaires could put their egos aside. If they could lead with curiosity instead of fear when they feel threatened by something different that they don't understand. If they could come down from their cushy ivory towers and spare the chunk change of their gluttonous wealth to help someone other than themselves.
If they could have the humility to remember that the dollar signs next to their net worth doesn't make them more valuable or worthy than anyone else.
If they could have the sight to see, that their privilege doesn't make them an exception to the inevitable cycle of life every natural creature on this miraculous planet they refuse to take care of is a part of.
If they had the moral compass to keep their actions in check knowing that the universe doesn't grant pardon to the rich from the Karma they've acquired that will follow them into the next life from the countless lives their willful ignorance has impacted.
But here's the truth of it, the sad truth of it.
No amount of privilege can make you special.
No amount of success can make you happy.
No amount of power can make you worthy.
No amount of control can make you feel safe.
No amount of money can make you feel enough.
And let's face it, it's never enough.
None of this matters in the end if you have to sell your soul and integrity for it.
No amount of riches, accolades, fame, or followers will ever satiate that gaping hole inside you. The one that you've guarded so well that only in the quiet, lonely, stillness can you hear the whispers you've tried to keep at bay saying "You're not enough. You'll never be good enough."
Like a fearful child hiding under an innumerable amount of safety blankets in hopes they will protect you from the scary monster that is just the darkness of your own shameful shadow.
You've armored your heart proudly because if you didn't, you would have to feel this. What pain you must be in. The decades of ignoring this pain are written all over the puckered look on your faces. So I won't let this heartache turn into hate and armor my heart like you. The grief my heart holds is what allows me to care for someone other than myself.
We may not have unsatiating amounts of money, possessions, privilege, or fame. However, we do have community, healing, joy, connection, compassion, innate worthiness, soul, and love.
We are love. You just forgot.
And love, always prevails.
-SG
