Loving Kindness

February is the month of love and a time where we can shower people we care for with it. We usually show it in the form of gifts or even just affection. It can be easy to show love and kindness for others, but what about towards ourselves? What about loving kindness and compassion for loved ones when we are upset or even people we don’t like. By practicing loving kindness it can help us be more less hostile towards ourselves and others and let go of negative emotions. 

Something we can do is to practice the mindfulness of “loving kindness.” How can we do that? I’m going to go through some step instructions to help us practice loving kindness. 

First off, choose someone in mind. If this is new to you, pick someone you already love or if you feel you got loving kindness down you can pick yourself or even someone they you have a harder time feeling compassion for, but would like to. 

Next get into a comfortable position (sitting, standing, laying down etc.) and breathe slow and deep. 

When you feel you’re ready start thinking of the person you picked. Recite the mantra of “May I be at happy”, “May I be at peace”, “May I be safe”, “May I be healthy” and any other wish that is positive. When you say the words think about the meaning of them especially in this context. If your thoughts get distracted just notice the distraction then redirect back to your mantras. Continue to do this until you feel loving kindness in you.

It’s best to practice this daily if your goal is to be more kind and compassionate towards others or even yourself. You can start off with someone who you find it easier to show compassion for and work your way up for example: (Loved ones, people you’re upset with, people you don’t care for and etc.)

This can be a great way to build loving kindness towards yourself if you have a hard time having compassion with yourself. Loving others is easy, but self love is important as well.

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Ref: : Linehan, M., M., (2014). DBT Training Manual. New York, NY: The Guilford Press.